


Everything, Something and Nothing

by lehuit



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Humor, Angst with a Happy Ending, Complicated Relationships, Fluff, Gay Male Character, Light Angst, M/M, Mutual Pining, Temporarily Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-05
Updated: 2018-12-31
Packaged: 2019-06-05 20:13:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 7,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15178448
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lehuit/pseuds/lehuit
Summary: Behind the flashes of cameras, the wild crowds and never ending schedules. There's love, pain and heartaches.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm trying to make this intact to the reality with a bit of plot twist. Try to bear with it.

Love. That’s the last thing Jun wants to talk about, not that he is bitter about it. It is because he’s basically in love with someone he can’t reach, figuratively. There are so many factors he needs to consider before opening about it. One (1), the fact that he is an idol and has to maintain an image. Not that he’s ashamed of it but the mind set of people may lead his coming out as a chance to drag him or the group down. Two (2), the fact that he needs to tell it to his family first before exploiting it to the public. His family is very supportive about him but he still needs to sit down and have a heart to heart talk with them. Lastly three (3), the fact that he’s in love with his co-member, Minghao, who is completely straight and oblivious about how Jun feels for him. Or, maybe he has an idea but he’s not interested of letting Jun pursue his feelings.

“Junnie?” Jun’s epiphany was cut when Seungkwan called him out. He stood up and followed the younger. He looked at Seungkwan and can’t help but to envy the kid. Vernon and Seungkwan were accepted and approved by both families. The kids were together since pre-debut and they are happily spending their times as idols without minding other people’s business because no one questions their natural bond with each other. Jun wanted that, too. He admits but he knows he can’t have it. Maybe, not now. Or, sadly, not ever.

“You’re spacing out again, hyung.” Seungkwan said, Jun smiled apologetically. Seungkwan hopped in the other van where the members are already resting as Jun opened the second van, he found the three leaders were in front while Jeonghan, Jisoo and Chan were in the middle. In the back part, he found Minghao facing his phone, he had no choice but to sit next to the other Chinese boy.

“Where have you been?” Jihoon asked when the van started moving away from their dorm. Jun nuzzled in his own seat before answering the vocal unit leader.

“I waited for Seungkwannie.” He said, Jihoon nodded and went back talking to Seungcheol. He stared at the two and smiled. Another couple in the group is Seungcheol and Jihoon. These two were also together ever since pre-debut, he watched the two running around because of the unspoken thing they had between them. It almost broke his heart when Seungcheol opened up about his issue with Jihoon when they were having a camp fire, it also lead to break up but fortunately, they talked it out and compromise about each other’s wants.

“You didn’t.” Minghao mumbled beside him, he glanced up to Junhui and rolled his eyes. It was his habit whenever Jun is trying to lie or trick him. Jun tilted his head and looked at Minghao. He is still wondering how the other knows whenever he is lying or not. He wasn’t transparent or anything but the guy is so good at knowing it.

“Beats me.” Jun shrugged and stuck his tongue out. He wasn’t exactly waiting for Seungkwan, he was thinking deeply of what would have happened to them if ever he confessed. He wanted to tell Minghao, he’s been dying to but he doesn’t know how to. He’s been in love with the younger for 2 years now. He didn’t realize it until he was simply missing the boy on the daily basis. He’s been in love, everyone knows he did, with Mingming. He thought it was something that would last long but if Jun were to choose, he can’t give up his dreams. Mingming thought the same way, too. They decided to part ways and Mingming left for good.

“Hyung, you okay?” Minghao asked him. He yawned and tried to lean in Minghao’s shoulder. The latter didn’t complain but instead helped Jun to be comfortable in that position. They were both busy in their phone when Jeonghan speak up.

“Junnie, I think you should know this.” He said without even looking at the back where the two Chinese were sitting. It became quiet and even their manager look at them with worries in his eyes. Jihoon looked at Jun before looking back at Jeonghan.

“You’ve heard about Mingming’s debut right?” Jeonghan asked, the mention of name made Jun sat properly and Minghao locked his phone to listen to the conversation. Jun nodded and let Jeonghan continued,”He will be performing in the KCon.” Jun didn’t know what to say. He was past Mingming but still there is a lingering feeling that will always stay for the first love.

“What’s the deal with him?” Minghao asked, he knew who Mingming is but what he doesn’t know is the relationship Jun had with him. Not that Jun didn’t trust Minghao, it’s just he didn’t know how to tell it since he tried not to open up with his past relationship and Minghao didn’t mind up until now.

“It’s a long story.” Jun finally replied, Minghao looked at him and raised an eyebrow. He just gave a small smile hoping Minghao wouldn’t mind. If he’s going to tell him about Mingming, he doesn’t want it to be where someone else hears them.

“Don’t worry, Jun. We’ll assure you won’t have to interact with him.” Their manager said and Jun shook his head, it was the dismissal of the topic. Minghao didn’t said any word, too. It was a silent ride after Mingming was brought in the conversation.

* * *

 

Junhui couldn’t stay still in his hotel room, he is sharing with Wonwoo but the said boy went to Seungcheol or Soonyoung to play some games. Jun walked back and forth, trying to figre something he’ll do if ever he encountered Mingming. It’s been ages since he last saw the guy and he still remembers how ethereal the man looks. He stopped walking around when he heard the door opened.

“Wonwoo, I’m anxious about meeting--Oh, hey.” He was cut off to see that it wasn’t his roommate who entered, it was Minghao anticipating what he was about to say. The younger walked past him and sat in Wonwoo’s bed. He looked up at Jun and raised an eyebrow again.

“Anxious about what, Junnie?” Minghao asked. Jun sighed and sat next to Minghao. He fiddled with his fingers while debating in his mind, whether to tell Minghao or not. The former won and he glanced at Minghao who is still staring at him.

“You’re hiding something from me, Junnie. I can feel it, I felt that for awhile now. The longer I let it slip, the larger thing you are trying to hide from me.” Minghao added. Jun immediately felt bad, he didn’t mean to be secretive to Minghao but if you’re in love, he think it’s necessary. “If you really don’t want to say it, I don’t want to push it.” Minghao shrugged and was about to stand up when Jun held the younger’s arm.

“Mingming and I had a thing back then.” Jun mumbled and Minghao didn’t respond. Jun wanted to look up but he didn’t have a heart to know what was Minghao’s reaction. It may break his heart right before he could even confess.

“We broke up and he left the company right before you came. He was everything that mattered to me, he was keeping me sane from the hardness and the doubts of ever debuting. It was fine until he had to choose between the love we had and the dreams we want. We both chose the same thing and then he left.” Jun’s word were intangible but Minghao heard him perfectly. He sat again and let Jun continued.

“I’ve moved on, I swear I do. But, meeting him isn’t exactly what I want now. Not when it took me years before getting over him, not when I’m perfectly fine.” Tears started blurring Jun’s vision but he told himself he’ll never cry for the same thing again.

“Are you sure you’re over him or you’re fine because he’s not around?” Minghao asked in monotone, he couldn’t measure what was Minghao’s point but he knew the answer. He’s over Mingming for years. And now, it was Minghao who makes him feel all giddy and weird. It was the guy beside him who makes him feel every bit of emotions.

“I’m over him, for years. I am jut anxious of what will happen. I’m,” He sighed, maybe Minghao needs to know. Minghao looked at him, waiting for what he was about to say again.

“I’m in love with you.” He said and looked back at Minghao.

“I know.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh. That.

He knew. Minghao knew. Jun looked up with panic in his eyes but he only met Minghao’s blank stares. He’s hurt, not knowing exactly why. Maybe by the fact that Minghao knew and he didn’t even tell Jun or the fact that Minghao doesn’t seem interested with him. Jun smiled a bit and continued talking. 

“You knew.” He mumbled,”And you didn’t say anything about it.” Jun said. Minghao lay in Wonwoo’s bed and put his hands as his pillow. Jun just looked down in his fingers. He’s embarrassed because he felt like an idiot for trying to hide something 

“You’re not hard to read, Junnie.” Minghao answered,”You’re pure and transparent with me and I’m not stupid not to notice it. Well, at first I thought it was nothing but soon, I realized you had something and I was waiting for you to open up about it.” He continued. 

“Is it the reason you spent less and less time with me? You’re disgusted by the fact that your hyung is in love with you?” Jun asked. Not that they weren’t that close anymore but if you really look closely, they’re not as close as they were. 

“No, of course not. I just notice you’re dense and nervous when I’m around so I thought you might need some space. Yes, I’m straight but I have nothing against any sexual preferences.” The younger explained. That makes sense, Jun thought. Not that Minghao hated Jun, he wasn’t into him. 

“If you’re still worrying about that Mingming guy, I got you.” Minghao yawned and stood up. Jun watched the boy walked out of the room. Minghao knew Jun’s in love with him. Jun sighed and he wanted to cry. Minghao didn’t exactly rejected him but he didn’t tell Jun that h likes him, too. He even cleared he’s straight. 

Jun remembers the very first time Minghao and he met. It was some time before they could debut. Minghao was the new Chinese trainee and Jun thought it was his childhood friend from Shenzhen. He got so excited and went wild while talking to the younger. After realizing that it wasn’t the same person, Jun got so embarrassed and didn’t talk to Minghao for weeks. Minghao laughs whenever he remembers how Jun looks whenever Minghao approaches him. It was a nice start, they were each other’s companion. Jun helps Minghao with translation and Minghao is forever grateful for having Junhui in his side, he wouldn’t have done it if it wasn’t for the older. 

Junhui is one of Minghao’s reasons behind his success in Korea. 

 

It was the final stage of KCon and Jun can see Mingming talking to Chan in the other end of their line. Mingming is throwing glances at Jun every second. Jun feels nervous so as soon as the encore ended, he was the first one who went to the backstage. Minghao saw Jun left immediately and he followed right after. 

“Jun!” He closed his eyes by the mention of his name, he knew who it was. Before he could even turn, Mingming was already in front of him. Looking so gorgeous as he always is. Mingming showed a sweet smile before hugging Junhui.

“How are you? It’s been ages.” Mingming said. Jun blink a few times before he could even process Mingming’s question. 

“I’m fine. So, I see you’ve debuted.” Jun smiled a bit, Mingming nodded joyfully. Mingming was about to say something when Minghao stood beside Jun. 

“Junnie, the managers are looking for you.” Minghao said and looked at Mingming, the other chinese is just smiling at them.

“I heard about you, Minghao right? I’m Mingming.” Mingming offered his hand and Minghan seems to gladly accept it. “Your fans are right, you two look great together.” Mingming added, Jun blushed and held Minghao’s hand. 

“We need to go, Mingming. It was nice seeing you.” Jun said but before they could even walked away, Mingming grabbed him by the free hand.

“Let’s talk, Jun. Please?” He asked, Jun let go of Minghao’s hand and pleaded him to give them a second. Minghao nodded and stayed out of the two’s way. He was standing somewhere far from them. He knew he owned Minghao an explanation late but he has to deal with Mingming first.

“Look, Mingming. We really need to go and I know you do, too. Just give me your number and I’ll text you whenever I’m free, we’ll talk then.” Jun explained but Mingming was just looking at him with hopeful eyes. 

“It’s nice to see you, Jun.” Mingming said and hugged him before bidding his good bye to Jun. The latter watched Mingming disappear from his view before hiding the calling card Mingming gave him. Jun and Minghao went to their respective dressing room and was bombarded with questions that Jun didn’t bother to answer, he just sat quietly and saved the number he got. Not knowing if he’ll ever use that number because honestly, he’s afraid of what Mingming will say to him.

The group went back to their hotel happily but Jun seems to be occupied so he immediately went to his room instead of following the members in Seungcheol’s room. He was laying on his bed when he heard the door opened, he knew it wasn’t Wonwoo this time, he knew it was Minghao. The younger looked at him as if he’s being weird. Minghao went beside him and stared at the ceiling as well. 

“Thank you for trying to pull me out.” Jun said. He knew Minghao promised to look after him but Jun was the one to dismissed Minghao. It’s just the smile in Mingming’s face is really precious and even though, Jun doesn’t love the latter. He still doesn’t have a heart to reject and take that smile away. 

“He said we looked good together.” Minghao replied, Jun nodded. That, that was also bothering him. He’s afraid that Minghao is offended by that compliment (at least, for Jun) Mingming said. Minghao is goddamn straight and has no interest to be match made with Jun. Minghao chuckled and turned his head to look at Jun.”I don’t disagree though.” He added. Jun looked at him with terrified eyes. 

“You’re kidding, right? There’s sarcasm right there.” Jun said. He didn’t know how to respond with what Minghao just said. He just agree that they look good together. Jun doesn’t want to jump into conclusions but it’s damn hard not to. 

“Yes, I am kidding.” Minghao laughed, Jun didn’t know if that hurts or he was relieved. Jun pouted but Minghao just turned his body to hug Jun’s waist. “Sorry, Junnie. I look better than you.” He mumbled, Jun slapped Minghao’s hand and crossed his arm. They stayed in that bed until Wonwoo kicked Minghao out of their room. 

Jun closed the door with a smile in his face and a laugh plastered in Minghao’s.


	3. Chapter 3

The schedules were never vacant for the whole group, going back and forth. So, Jun barely had the time to think about his promise to Mingming. It was around the end of April when the management told them about the upcoming show they will be participating in China. That’s when Jun remembered about it. 

“Just the two of us?” Jun asked their managers, pointing Minghao and himself. The managers nodded. Junhui felt happy, they’re going back to their homeland and they are going to perform in China, in front of Chinese carats. 

“You’re not coming with us?” Minghao asked, their managers just laughed. Jun didn’t get the humor they were all sharing so he didn’t laugh, instead he stared back at Minghao and shrugged. 

“You’re not that lucky, two managers will come with you.” They both nodded. 

“Who else will be there?” Jun asked, Minghao was staring at him again. He knew what Minghao thinking and will be questioned later but he couldn’t help to worry what might happen in that show or who he might see. 

“They didn’t say.” And the topic drifted away. When the meeting ended, Minghao and he went back to their dorm, no one was speaking. It was dead silence until they reach the apartment’s door. 

“Do you still have some sort of feelings for him, Junhui?” Minghao asked deadpanned which called Jun off guard. He wasn’t expecting for something that straight forward. Minghao was just staring at him and he can’t even decipher what the younger was thinking. He shook his head and snickered. 

“You know it well who I have feelings for now, Hao. I am just worried.” Jun said and tried to walk past Minghao but the younger held his wrist and sighed. If Minghao can hear through Jun, he can hear the loud thump of Jun’s heart. He’s nervous because of Minghao’s approach about this Mingming issue and because Minghao is holding him now. 

“Let’s drink some wine, hyung. My bar’s open for us.” Minghao said with a small smile plastered in his face. Jun’s heart was racing so fast and he was holding his breath, what’s in front of him was ethereal. Minghao wanted to chuckled because Jun was blushing so hard with wide eyes. 

“Okay, I’ll just, uhm, change clothes and, uhm, yeah, I’ll be there.” Jun stuttered and went in. Minghao followed, quietly laughing because he made Jun flustered. What he didn’t notice is the pair of eyes watching them. Seungcheol glared at him. 

“You’re bullying him, again.” The leader called out, Minghao shook his head while laughing and continued walking into his room. He prepared a bottle for the two of them and two wine glass. He played a romantic music and turned on the fairy light, he was busy taking pictures of his room when Mingyu busted his way in. 

“Is the bar open tonight?” He asked excitedly, Minghao groaned and tried to push the full grown man out of his room but his arms weren’t capable to do so. Minghao glared and sat down in his bed.

“It’s exclusive for Jun hyung and I!” Minghao hissed, Mingyu immediately looked at him with teasing smile. Minghao wanted to kick Mingyu but he knows it will do him no good too.

“Is there something you want to tell me?” Mingyu asked him, he rolled his eyes. Before he could even say something, Jun opened the door and looked at them. Jun showed surprised in his eyes. Minghao stood up and faked a smile at Mingyu who kept shifting his looks at the two Chinese boys.

“I guess I have to leave now.” Mingyu said sarcastically, Jun went inside the room and looked back and forth to the two younger boys,”You could stay if you want.” Jun said, Mingyu looked excited again but when he saw Minghao glaring at him, he just pouted. 

“Well, hyung. I think I can’t stay because Minghao is glaring at me!” Mingyu ran out of the room before Minghao could even grab him. Jun was staring at them, cluelessly. 

“Don’t mind him, he’s stupid.” Minghao said and closed the door. Jun found himself sitting comfortably in Minghao’s bed, the younger reached for the wine glass and handed one to Jun. 

“To our China schedules,” Jun cheered with a genuine smile, Minghao smiled back and let their glasses clicked,”What’s with the sudden bar opening, Hao?” Jun asked as Minghao sat beside him. 

“Nothing, I just want to spend some time with you. I don’t want you to feel that we’re drifting apart, hyung.” Minghao answered. Jun was surprised by what Minghao said. He didn’t expect something so honest like that. To be honest, Jun was so used by being rejected by Minghao in every possible way. Not that Junhui takes it badly but he just got used to it. 

“You have the right to drift away, Hao. I understand it, you don’t need to do all this—”

“I want to, Junnie.” Minghao cut him with a small smile,”I want to do this. I don’t want you thinking that I don’t like you or I’m mad about your feelings because I am not.” He added. Jun wanted to run out of the room and never face Minghao again. He is so straightforward! Jun let out a small laugh to ease the atmosphere. 

“If you keep doing this, it feels like you’re obliged to take good care of my heart just because I’m in love with you. It feels like I am making you responsible for all of these which sucks because you’re not. You’re free to do anything, Hao. The only thing that can break my heart is knowing that I am pushing myself towards you.” Jun said, he was stuttering and mumbling but Minghao was just listening so intently that he didn’t miss any beat. 

“Junhui.” Minghao called him, Jun met his eyes and saw seriousness in the younger’s eyes. He doesn’t know if Minghao was mad or not. All he can see is a blank stare and he couldn’t get through it,”You’re not hard to love.” He added.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> By all means

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A filler chater jkshfkjshfkjhs

After that night, everything went back to normal for both of them. Well, not for Jun. What Minghao said is still bugging him every now and then but he didn’t want to put too much content to it. Maybe it just means that he loves Junhui in some platonic way and Jun didn’t want to get his hopes high even if he still blushes whenever he remembers. 

“Ready?” Minghao knocked on their door, Jun looked up and nodded. Every members is jammed in their living room, waiting for the both of them. 

“Take care, alright? Minghao, take care of Junnie. Don’t let him starve himself in his room all day.” Seungcheol said which made Jun pouted because they are obviously making fun of them because Minghao is snickering beside him. 

“Don’t let him be succumb by the bed or his phone.” Jihoon added.   
“Make sure he gets his bedtime stories.” Soonyoung kid. Jun stomped his foot and whined. He knew they’d make fun of him but he still didn’t expect like this. 

“I told you, Junnie. I’m the hyung.” Minghao barked at laugh. 

“Don’t be like that to hyung!” Seokmin said and hugged the older Chinese. 

“We’re just messing around, we’ll miss this kid.” Seungcheol messed Jun’s hair and pat his back,”Come back in one piece. Go ahead before Mingyu cries.” Cheol added, Jun pulled Minghao out of the apartment because he seems to be very engaged in the conversations. 

They arrived early in the airport so they had to wait for their flight, the two sat down and had all the fansites following them. 

“Are you nervous?” Minghao asked,”Because I am.” Then he chuckled. Jun smiled genuinely at him. 

“You’ll be there so I’m not.” Jun answered with the stable smile in his face. Minghao got shy and hide his laugh from the fans in front of them. 

“Your flirting is getting better and better.” Minghao mumbled while laughing, causing Jun to laugh, too. They were busy in their own little world with subtle smiles and looks they were exchanging. 

Then, Jun tried to put his legs in Minghao’s thigh which earned a grunt from the younger. He tried several tries which is constantly rejected by Minghao. 

“Ge, stop being playful.” Minghao warned him but he replied with a smile instead. 

——

When they arrived in the hotel where they will staying, the two found out they will share a room for the rest of their stay. So they had to make some ground rules. 

“No music before sleeping, please.” Jun immediately said. 

“No!” Minghao objected,”You know I can’t sleep without it.” 

“But I can’t sleep with it!” Jun pouted. 

“I’ll play soft music.” Minghao tried to compromised, Jun went silent and nodded. 

“I will be the one in charge for the choice of food.” Minghao said because he knew that Jun is very fond of sour, spicy and junk foods which is the total opposite of what Minghao wants. Minghao needs them to be healthy. 

“But you order to much vegetables!” Jun whined. Minghao massaged his temples, it’s going to be tough for the both of them he thought. This is one of the reasons they can’t stay in one room because they repel each other’s likes. 

“Here, Ge. We’ll compromise again,” Minghao answered which earned a nod from the older,”I’ll order meat in the breakfast but you still need to eat vegetables, junk foods will do you no good.” He partly scolded the older boy who is now pouting. 

“And I’ll get to choose dinner.” Jun was hopeful with it and he clapped when Minghao sighed and nodded. Their phones beeped continuously and when they checked, they are being bombarded by their members. 

“Is that all you want, Junnie?” Minghao asked for dismissal, Jun was so engaged with his phone and just nodded right away. Minghao stood up and checked his luggage, he secretly smiled when he heard Junhui giggling in his bed. 

He admits that he really felt bad for letting Jun think that he stayed away from him, he just don’t want to tower over Junhui’s feelings and he actually misses times like this. When they are together and Jun is just being jolly while Minghao is around listening to him. 

Minghao was true to his words, he did really mean it. Jun isn’t hard to love when he just gives so many reasons to be loved.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> That silver bracelet he gave.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So I removed the tags because I am now focusing on Junhao's view first maybe I'll add it up again when I figure out or if I actually started writing about the other boys

The Chinese event they went to was very tiresome though all they did was play and talk to their friends, Junhui felt like he couldn’t move another muscle after he landed on the bed. He hid his face in his pillow and thought about everything that happened earlier. Minghao was so affectionate to him, not that he minds but it felt flustering for him. He was hugged by Minghao all day long, Minghao even wiped the water in his face when he spit everything just because Minghao said something funny. He started screaming at his pillow and wiggling his arms. He’s happy. Very. Oh God knows how much Junhui asked for a day like this. He immediately fishes his phone out and looked for previews for today’s event and he was right, Minghao was extra clingy, so is he. 

“Hey.” Minghao dived next to him so he immediately hid his phone. 

“What are you hiding?” Minghao asked him. He shook his head and went back to his pillow. He can’t stop smiling. He felt Minghao patted his hair. 

“Tired?” Minghao asked again, he nodded this time. He can’t answered because he knew his voice would come off high pitched and that would have been obvious. 

“You’re so adorable, feifei.” Minghao snickered. Junhui’s face heated up by the nickname Minghao just called him.

“Where did you learn that?” He asked, it was inaudible since he was talking against his pillow. 

“From the Chinese carats earlier. It’s cute, I like it.” Minghao answered proudly,”Feifei.” Minghao called him as he brushed his fingers in Junhui’s hair.

“Stop!” Junhui whined. Minghao just laughed and ruffled his hair. 

“Let’s eat dinner, Feifei. It’s your time to choose.” Junhui felt the weight beside him lifted so Minghao must have bounce off his bed. 

“I’m too tired.” Junhui whined in his high pitched voice. 

“What do you want me to do then? Carry you?” Minghao snarled and tried to pull him off his bed. Jun just whined and shook his head.

“I’m dead. I’m dead.” He sung as he let his weight fall in Minghao’s arms.

“Aigoo. Let’s go, Ge.” Minghao plead. They both lasted in the argument for a couple of minutes until Minghao gave up and ordered room service for the two of them. Junhui was too occupied by his phone when the food arrived so Minghao fixed their table.

“Feifei, dinner’s ready.” Minghao said jokingly, he saw the faint blush in Junhui’s face, causing him to chuckle. 

“You’re not gonna let that go, are you?” Junhui pouted. 

“Never.” He beamed and poured soup in Junhui’s bowl. 

—

They had an interview right after that event. It happened in the hotel lobby they were staying at. It was normal question about the sport event they attended, it was all about that but when the interview’s about to end. It was a challenge for Minghao to describe himself in 30 seconds.   
“I couldn’t do that.” He said and laughed lightly. The producer gave Junhui a challenging look, so he shifted in his chair, causing Minghao to look at him. 

“Eyes are pretty, nose’s pretty, mouth’s pretty, face’s pretyy, body’s pretty, all of him is pretty and good! He’s not only cute but also cool! He even has a sense! He is a cutie off stage but when he’s on stage, he has ch—risma? Chrisma? Charisma!” Jun described Minghao jubilantly. Minghao smiled a bit and wanted to pinch the older’s cheek but instead he said proceed. 

“Whenever I take a walk after eating or I want to go exercise, I always ask him to come with me but he always excuse himself with that I will go next time phrase.” Minghao answered when he was asked about his habits.

“When he leaves, I am lying like this,” Junhui demonstrated like he has a phone above his face,”And when he returns, I am still lying like that!” He giggled. 

“True.” Minghao looked at him and smiled. The interview ended and they thanked the staffs. Junhui didn’t want to put too much context with what Minghao is doing to him. He looked at him earlier with such fond in his eyes and when Junhui looks back, he immediately looked away and giggled cutely. 

If Minghao is trying to slowly kill him, he’s succeeding. Junhui couldn’t contain his smiles because of Minghao. When they went back to their room, Junhui flopped himself in his bed knowing the younger would be the one who will close the door. 

“I’m so so tired.” Junhui yawned and removed his shoes to lay on his bed. Minghao just smiled and sat beside him. He was just staring at Junhui in some fond way again. 

“What?” Junhui asked with a pout. Minghao lowered down and pecked on Junhui’s lips. That made Jun froze. He couldn’t register what just happened, what just Minghao did, what did just happen and again, what just Minghao did. 

“Stop being too adorable.” Minghao chuckled and flicked Jun’s forehead. The younger stood up from the bed and went to his bag like nothing just happened. 

“Minghao, why?” Jun asked breathlessly. Minghao didn’t turn around but he was just busy rummaging his bag. 

“Minghao, why did you do that?” Junhui aske once more, tears building up in his eyes. He felt pathetic, he somehow felt like he pushed himself too much to Minghao that it leads to this. It leads to Minghao trying his best to make Junhui feel better but acting like he really has something for the guy. 

“Minghao.” He called with broken voice. He is crying so hard. Minghao finally stopped and turned to face him. He was holding a small velvet bag in his hands. Minghao hurried next to him and wiped his tears.

“Don’t cry, Junnie. Listen to me first. Please.” Minghao said so softly that Junhui nodded. He sniffed and just looked at Minghao. 

“I feel the same way too, Junnie. Ever since. At first, yes, I thought I was just infatuated because you took care of me the most. I thought that I am just fond of you because you are a small part of my home and that’s what kept me going since but then I realized if it was just infatuation, why did it last for so long and why do I have this sense of being home when I’m with you. I didn’t think you felt the same way before but I started to notice you do, I gave you space and let you think clearly. I didn’t want to rush myself to be with you. I wanted you to place yourself in the picture you want. That’s why I spent less time with you and then you confessed and finally, I thought. I don’t want you to think that I am just doing this out of pity because honestly, Junhui? I loved you first and I am genuinely in love with you still.” Minghao took out a silver chained bracelet from the bag. There was a small heart pendant, too. Junhui didn’t know what to say because he felt ecstatic. He felt so happy in his life because he never thought Minghao loves him too. He never thought this would come dream but it did. Minghao put the bracelet around Jun’s wrist and he looked up to see the older’s reaction. 

“I’m sorry if I couldn’t wait longer.” Minghao chuckled, Junhui let out a chuckle before hugging Minghao tightly that it made them fell on the bed. Junhui nuzzled in Minghao’s neck and just murmured the things that Minghao wanted to hear. 

I love you. Thank you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hope you enjoyed! uwu 
> 
> be my moots: @adgzjs on twt


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Minghao knows.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, everyone. This is a special chapter for Minghao. The timeline of this is the first chapter. I just wanted to insert this here because I just want to explain Minghao's side when he said he loves Junnie too. jhgjhdgjhg

Minghao never really thought of falling in love with someone but when the moment he did, he knew it was worth it. Making fool of himself, doing things he never thought he’ll do, it was all worth it for a small smile plastered in the face of the one he loves. As a romantic person, Minghao knew the difference of loving someone so badly and loving someone so good. Loving someone so badly meant you feel so much for that person that it’s just overbearing and drowning you and you have no idea what will it cost you, it’s like missing someone so bad that you wanted to be with him or her to ease that feeling. It was that kind of loving that consumes you and sometimes lead to intoxication. But loving someone so good is the contentment you feel for what you have, it doesn’t matter if the feeling is reciprocated or not, it’s fine, despite of the pain or the hard times, it’s okay because you are fine with it. You don’t ask for something in return, you are just enjoying the feeling of loving someone with no other intentions. It feels good and right like you love to love. 

 

Minghao loves Junhui. He loves him, in good times and especially in bad times. He loves Jun whether he’s a mess or not. He loves Jun so good and it was perfect for him. Seeing Jun smiles whenever he succeeded annoying Minghao, whenever he tries to shamelessly flirt with Minghao, whenever Jun clings to him like a leech. It was the good times but what stands out is loving Junhui in his darkest of times, whenever Jun tries to shut him out, whenever the older never opens up about his insecurities, whenever Jun falls asleep crying after crawling into Minghao’s bed. He loved Jun so dearly that no matter how complicated it gets, he stays. He always do. 

 

“You love him, do you?” Mingyu asked after he seeing Minghao soothing Jun after having his breakdown. Jun was sleeping in his arms and he looked so peaceful yet so tired. Minghao lifted his head and nodded. 

 

“More than anything.” Minghao replied and ran his fingers through Jun’s hair. Mingyu smiled at the sight because he knew how genuine Minghao answered.

 

“When will he realize you love him too?” Mingyu asked again. Jun’s in love with him, for a very long time. Jun loves Minghao yet he’s oblivious of Minghao’s feelings for him. He always thought that he wasn’t good enough to be loved by someone, particularly by Minghao but he’s wrong. Minghao knew how much they deserve each other. He won’t say he doesn’t when he knows that he can love Junhui so much. 

 

Junhui groaned and tried to find another comfortable spot for himself. Minghao just watched the older gripped on his shirt tight and he nuzzled on the younger’s neck. 

 

“In the right time, maybe.” Minghao said and kissed Junhui’s forehead. Mingyu nodded and slept on his bed. Not minding the pair he’s sharing the room with. Morning after that, Minghao woke up alone with a note in his table. Jun doodled with his pens and said thank you. 

 

Years passed, Minghao still feel the same for Junhui and if something changed, his love became deeper and more passionate. He might not show it to Jun but he’s always been in love with the older and he’s contented with the smiles and happiness Jun radiates to him. 

 

“I’m in love with you.” Junhui said and he was just staring at Minghao with those adorable eyes. 

 

“I know.” He answered. Finally, he thought. 

 

There's no pity with what Minghao feels for Junhui. It is genuine and it will always be. Maybe, he did deny it to himself at first. It's hard to know you're in love with someone you've been with for a long time. It's hard to identify if it's just a brotherly love or not but eventually, he did. He loves Jun in ways that he needs to be loved. The older might not notice it but Minghao loves him as much as Jun does. So when Junhui said yes to be his boyfriend, Minghao felt so happy. He's happier than he was. Being able to call Jun his is something he always wanted to do but didn't push to. 

 

"I love you." The older said. Minghao chuckled and kissed his temple. 

 

"I love you too." He replied with so much emotions. He hugged Junhui tighter and he never wants to let go.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He will always be his first choice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NYE!!! 2018 was great but I hope 2019 will surpass 2018's greatness!!!

Junhui woke up with Minghao’s arms around his waist, they didn’t sleep much that night either. They talked and cuddled like they’ve been together for years until Junhui yawned and slowly fell asleep. Minghao tucked them in the blankets and he wrapped his arms around Junhui and kissed the older’s forehead. 

 

“Good morning.” Minghao greeted him with a groggy voice. Junhui smiled and turned to face Minghao who is adjusting from the light shining from the window. 

 

“Good morning.” Junhui combed Minghao’s hair back to stop blocking the younger’s sight. 

 

“You look happy, Feifei.” The younger said jokingly. 

 

“Ecstatic.” Jun said and kissed his cheeks. They both sat up but Minghao just let his head fall in Junhui’s shoulders as his arms are still wrapped around the other’s waist. 

 

“It’s gonna be the first shooting of the show.” Junhui reminded him. The younger hummed and nodded. 

 

“Let’s get ready now, Haohao.” Junhui said and patted Minghao’s hand, telling him to let go, but instead Minghao whined and hugged tighter which made Junhui squeal. 

 

“Hao!” He shrieked while laughing, Minghao kissed his shoulder and tickled him. 

 

“Come on! Stop it!” Jun said between his laugh. He ended up laying in the bed again, with Minghao above him and his arms in Jun’s both side supporting his weight. 

 

“I love you.” They both said at the same time, Jun giggled and let Minghao shower him with little kisses all over his face. Someone knocked on the door before Minghao could even kiss Jun fully. He groaned and stood up while Jun laughed at his frustration. 

 

“You two should get ready. Bring your luggage as well.” Their manager said when Minghao opened the door, the younger nodded and went back to the bed. 

 

“Are you still sleepy?” Minghao asked him, he nodded and yawned. 

 

“I’ll go ahead and take a shower. Take a nap first, I’ll wake you up if I’m finished.” Minghao kissed his forehead and let him lay down. Junhui nodded and let himself to take a nap. 

 

They were filming their arrival that day, Jun and Hao brought their luggage because the producers said they provided a place where the contestants can stay at. Figuring out what room should they use, Minghao picked a vacant room and settled with Junhui. 

 

Junhui felt so happy when he met Samuel again. It’s been ages since he and Samuel actually spent time together. They were still in contact but spending time with the younger is still different. Samuel asked him off cam about the other members and he gladly told him stories. When they ate, Samuel was a bit quiet since he can’t fully understand Mandarin. Junhui was watching, worrying. He wanted to talk to him in Korean but they were filming so he couldn’t. To his surprise, Minghao assisted the younger and helped him with the dishes. Jun felt butterflies in his stomach but he was just staring at the two. Minghao glanced at him and offered a small smile. 

 

They were given a task right after. The day seems so long because they had to practice until midnight, the producers wrapped the day up by 2 AM. Minghao and Junhui went to their respective room. They still have to film after the hours of practicing. They both did their greetings together. Trying to light Minghao’s mood up, Junhui was subtly flirting him with him. Minghao wanted to laugh at him but instead he stared at Jun as he sings playfully. He gently pat Junhui's cheek, hiding a small smile when Jun giggled. 

 

Jun was stressed. He was the mixture of nervous and anxious. He kept fidgeting with his mic and his gestures were immediate and trembling. Minghao had to watch him like that and he was worrying. He couldn’t hug Junhui in front of everyone. He couldn’t kiss the man’s forehead and tell he’s doing a great job. Right after Jun finished rehearsing, he stood up and told Jun was what the problem. In the lunch break, he pulled Junhui somewhere private. 

 

“Are you still nervous?” Minghao asked Jun. He nodded shakily and looked down. Mingbao sighed and hugged him. 

 

“You can do it, baby.” He swayed gently, trying to make his partner feel better. Jun sighed and hugged Minghao tighter. 

 

“Everything’s gonna be alright. I’ll be there watching you. You’re doing great, darling.” He kissed Jun’s forehead. 

 

“Thank you.” Jun mumbled, Minghao cupped his cheeks and kissed him on the lips. 

 

“Don’t worry, you’re doing absolutely amazing. Just trust yourself, have confidence. Alright? Don’t be nervous.” Minghao hugged him tight for one last time before letting go so they can go back to the rehearsals. 

 

When Junhui was asked who he wants to be partnered with, Minghao immediately came into his mind. Minghao was the peace in the chaos of his mind. Minghao knows what to do when to do it and how to execute it. He knows that if he and Minghao were paired, they’ll have a perfect stage and they can perform My I for the first time, in a Chinese show. Of course, he had to answer Minghao without a doubt. 

 

When Minghao was asked who he wants to be partnered with, he answered Jony J. He looked up to him ever since and it will be an honor for him to perform in the same stage with the guy. At the end of the show, the producers revealed who got the highest rank and Jun got it, he came in the second. 

 

Junhui picked Minghao. He will always do. 

 

But when the producers said Minghao can decline Jun and he can also pick who he wants to be paired with. Junhui felt nervous, he doesn’t know if Minghao will accept him as a partner. He doesn’t know so he looked down, trying his best to keep his posture. When he saw Minghao stepped forward, he felt happy. 

 

“Of course, we’re together.” Minghao said with so much meaning and smiled at everyone. He can’t help but to grin as well. The other boys cheered and teased them. Junhui paid no mind. 

 

Minghao chose him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Feel free to talk to me at twt : @gfbythe8


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